My Story Of Being Bullied

Posted: 1/18/2012

First, I want to say I congratulate and admire all of you who have come forward in sharing your stories with all of us. Each unique story brings inspiration, hope and a reminds everyone else that they are not alone in their suffering.

I am 32 years old, but I was a victim of childhood bullying. It started in 6th grade, my first year of junior high school. I was made fun of for being too skinny, wearing clothes that weren't brand name, I was called ugly, told I smelled, had gross hair, everything. I was spit at, pushed into walls, jumped once, and had my belongings destroyed - someone cut my brand new raincoat to pieces for spite. I tried to smile through the pain and go on with my life but over time it took a serious toll on me. I began feeling sick and anxious at the thought of going to school. I lost interest in everything. I felt so ugly, worthless, hopeless, and sad. What should have been fun, happy years of my life, were tainted by vicious kids.

This bullying affected EVERYTHING. From doing poorly on my SAT's and not gaining admittance to college post high school, to paranoia-anxiety disorder, to poor relationship and friendship choices . . . the list goes on. I allowed myself to be their victim, I let them win.

At the age of 28 I took a stand for myself to fight back. After reflecting on my early 20's and taking stock of my choices in life, I realized that I was STILL allowing people to use me, abuse me, and take me for granted. Standing up for yourself does not mean being a bad, uncaring, unloving person. It means having enough dignity for yourself to know when to walk away. It takes a lot of courage to say enough is enough but I have. I became an animal rights activist, a church volunteer, I won the Miss Long Island Model 4x in a row, went on to being crowned Ms. East Coast USA Fitness Supreme Champion, was an honor roll student in college, and became a Fitness Competitor. Working out and dieting with discipline not only made me feel and look good but it gave me a goal to focus on and accomplish...ME

Today at 32, I still carry some of the scars within from the bullying, I'm not sure it'll ever go away but one thing I know for sure, I will NEVER "allow" myself to be a victim again! I wasted enough of my life.

On a side note, most of those kids that made fun of me?  They wound up in jail, miserable, or worse, dead from overdose.I guess I'm finally realizing maybe I wasn't the one with the problem. Anyone who feels the need to hurt someone in anyway obviously is projecting their misery onto you, either stemming from jealousy or just pure internal conflict. Whatever be the case, remember, YOU are NOT the one with the problem.

Be you, enjoy you, realize you have a reason you are alive, find your purpose and calling, be an inspiration and most of all, never be a victim again.

Fight back by being fabulous!!

Love, respect and best wishes to you all.

By: Jacklyn