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Somehow I Manage

Posted: 12/23/2013

My life changing experience started when I was in 6th grade. As soon as I started at my new school I was picked on. At first it was because I was shy and new. It did not bother me, due to that fact that I have been told stuff like that before. However, it did not start getting worse until around the middle of the school year. They started calling me a fag, queer, homo, spread rumors about me in school and in public websites such as myspace at the time and youtube. Most of the teachers knew and there were some that said something to the “popular” kids that were doing the bullying.

During all of the bullying in 2008, my seventeen year old cousin was killed in a dirt bike accident on a dirt road. It changed my attitude for several weeks. I had stopped eating, stayed home from school, and wouldn’t come out of my bedroom. It was the point in my life where I had become overcome with sadness and wanting the pain to disappear. Losing my cousin who was not only family, but I considered one of my best friends, it wore me out physically and emotionally. Add bullying on top of that and it’s a very difficult situation to be in. During the winter of 2008, my family decided to move out to a small town. It was only a few minutes away from my cousin’s parents and other family members. When I started school, I honestly thought that because of being related to my cousin and everyone knowing who I was, I wouldn't have had a problem. Yeah, well I was defiantly wrong. It was ten times worse than what I was dealing with previously. I was again called names such as fag and etc; they spit on me during science class one day, and even ran into me on purpose in the hallways. It got so bad that I would constantly call home during lunch, begging my parents to let me come home. The teachers, principle, and resource officer all knew what was going on. One teacher stepped up and helped me during the entire three years it was happening.

During the summer of 2009, my parents had separated and I lost two close family members. When I returned to school after missing a few days, my mother went to the school with me to inform the principle at the time what all had happened and asked to make sure nobody starts with me. That very day, I went into math class and sat down. No one said anything to me, which was a good sign for me. I stood up and went to my math teachers deck to turn in my makeup work from the days I had missed. On my way walking up to her desk, some of the kids decided to make some smart comments to me. When I got to the desk, I turned around and asked if they had an issue. None of them answered me, so I went back to my desk and was getting ready to sit down when I heard them again. I repeated and asked again if anyone had a problem. Two of them turned around and looked at me. The one was the “leader” of the bullying pack and the other was a follower. At that point, I took my glasses off and proceeded to walk up to his desk. I looked right at him and pretty much yelled in his face if he had an issue. When he looked up I remember throwing the first half of a punch, but blacked out after that. When I came back too, my teacher was yelling at me to get down to the office. I grabbed my glasses and ran down the stairs. When I went into the office I told the secretary to call the ambulance because I just got into a fight with another student. They immediately took me into the Principal’s Office and locked both doors. I was told to call my parents and have them come to the school as soon as possible. By the time my parents got to the school, I had two cops in a tiny room telling me to write down exactly what happened and told me to sign this paper that said they told me my writes than had a teacher sign it as a witness when she was no where near the room when they were doing this. I had to do probation because of the fight.

Because of being bullied for so long, I now have several mental illnesses and struggle to keep going everyday, but I somehow manage. I right now work as an STNA in a nursing home, but my dream is to race for a cause and a living.

By: Colton

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Seek Someone Out

Posted: 12/23/2013

I am 14 years old and can’t even begin to say how much being bullied has affected my life. It all started lasts year when a girl dropped a note on my desk telling me that I was a slut and a whore and to just go kill myself. After that, no one liked me or talked to me. I fell into depression and started cutting. I told my parents what was going on at school, but they didn’t listen until I tried to take my own life. After that, I was homeschooled for the rest of the year.

But it kept on going.

This year, I’ve been called names that wouldn't be appropriate to write, let alone say. I’ve received letters in my locker and on my desk calling me things like “emo b**ch” and threats like “if you don't kill yourself, we might kill you.” After a second attempt of committing suicide and lots of crying, my parents are having me homeschooled. I can’t even begin to imagine what they say about me.

But there is hope.

I know from experience how it feels to get bullied. It would have been bearable if I had at least one friend to help me through, but I didn’t. Seek someone out. It could be an older person, a counselor, or even your siblings. You have to speak up before it’s too late.

By: Makenzie

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Creating a better future

Posted: 12/13/2013

My name is Tracy and I am 38 years old.

Sometimes I wish I knew how to express in words what bullying has done to me, how it has shaped all aspects of my life. Adults often forget that children see and know more than we give them credit for. As a child, I was very pale, very very skinny and had big thick glasses. The other kids would make fun of me so badly that I started hiding in the coat closet so I didn't have to go out on the playground during recess. I had no friends in school and by the time I was in sixth grade every single one of my teachers in grade school had commented to my parents that I was lonely and had no friends. There were many incidents where the teachers or the principal not only knew what was going on, but witnessed it. Nothing was ever done and by the time I was in first grade I had stopped telling anyone what was going on including my parents.

In middle school things got worse. There were 3 times more people to deal with, there were beatings in the girls locker room, with the onset of puberty it meant that both boys and girls alike were telling me how ugly I was and how I was a loser. By the end of junior high I was suicidal and only the love of my father and the lady across the street would keep me going.

In high school I got contact lenses and people began to stop calling me names to my face. I became invisible, I wasn't good enough to be invited to anyone's house or birthday parties and I was never asked out on a date by a boy, but I wasn't beat up or called names.

Through my entire 13 years of public school I was never picked for a team. Never asked to join a group for a group project. Never given the student of the month award. Never asked to participate in school activities such as home coming. No teacher, No Assistant's, No principal's ever stepped in and stood up for me or did anything to stop what was going on.

I graduated in 1993 and by 2000 I began to experience severe depression and anger. I began taking medication and going to therapy. But there is no happy ending for me. 20 years later I can tell you in vivid detail about a lot of the events that happened to me from first grade through my senior year. I can tell you that even today my class mates do not consider me someone that is worth knowing, even on social media web pages.

There are scars inside of me that will never fade, There is anger and depression that I don't know how to get past, that will never go away. There are mornings when I wake up and I still think all of those horrible things they said about me are true. But the worst cross to bear is to look into the eyes of my five year old daughter every day and pray and hope with every fiber of my soul that she doesn't suffer the same way that I did.

I want people to stop and think about what they do, and what they say because you can never go back, take back or give back what's lost once the moment is gone. If I can raise the awareness, give any child hope or happiness, if I can make a difference in the life of our children then I have taken one more small step towards creating a better future as well as my own future and taking back what I lost.

By: Tracy

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BECAUSE I CARE ABOUT YOU

Posted: 12/11/2013

So my name is Julie. I am 16 I have been bullied all my life, since kindergarten, back then it was not so bad you know the haha you can’t spell red and yes I could not spell it (later to be found out at 16 I have dyslexia).

But I want to say once I hit second grade it got really bad. Like kids were hurting me they were hitting me pulling me off play set and using me. They used me to get things they wanted. At the time, tic tacs were big thing in my school, there was this girl in my class who had to take the elevator every day and she said if I got her tic tacs I could ride with her the rest of the year. Well, that never happened.

By the time fourth grade came round my mom say how bad things were for me and since she was homeschooling my brothers she pulled me from public school and I am now homeschooled. I still have problems with bullying and my escape is by watching PLL. The shows help me just go off into my own world which I needed at the time (this was at 14 or 15 I can’t remember) I am now out of the world but still love to keep up with the show.

But you know what has helped me more than that through all I went through in school there was one person who was there for me. My best friend. She was the only one who liked me for me. She has been the one without even knowing it stopped me from killing myself, because if there is one person who cares for me I don't care how many hate me.

I want people to know that no matter how many people say no one cares about them those people are wrong.

You want to know why? Well because I care about you.

I may not know you but I care about all the people on this earth no matter what you look like.

So just remember I care and I bet so do other people.

By: Julie

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As One

Posted: 12/6/2013

My name is Tara Baker, I'm an actress and recently moved to Los Angeles from Bellingham, WA. I'm 21, openly gay, and have been for 2 years. Back in my home town, I had become a mentor in my community and routinely helped children and teens and even adults through struggles related to sexuality, bullying, drug/alcohol abuse, etc. I've been through some really hard times, I've been bullied, I've been called names, I've turned to some things that weren't the best choices to deal with what I was going through. But because of that, now I'm able to help others who may be going through hard times. Every single day I strive to be the role model that I want people to be able to look up to and remember, and to be sure that people know they can talk to me and I will listen, and they are never alone.

When I get to where I want to be in my acting career, I want to still stand as the same person I am now. I strive to help people believe that things WILL get better. Because at one point I didn't think things in my life would get better, but now here I am, standing tall, and working towards bigger goals (: This video is a song that I wrote about bullying and taking a stand against it, and I also added commentary to the video explaining the song and its significance. I want to show people that they don't need to be afraid of who they are, whoever that person it, and that love is louder than bullying, hate, discrimination, abuse, etc.

I care about bullying prevention because I know what it's like to be bullied and to feel like you don't have a voice. But with the right support, and being there for others to help them stand up, we can rise above it. Even one helping hand is enough to save a life. I've talked people down from suicide, and that's one reason why I live my life the way I do and try to help in any way I can. Because I may not be able to help everybody, but I'll never stop trying to do so. And I want to encourage as many people as I can to not be afraid to use their voices too.

By: Tara Baker

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Doing it for others

Posted: 11/22/2013

Have I been bullied? Of course.

Coming from a separated family that has moved several times, I've gone through a lot. Being the new girl over and over is tough, but at the same time it's a blessing. Everywhere I have lived I have been picked on, had things said about me behind my back, had friends turn on me, had problems at home. I have fought through cutting myself and am still fighting through depression. The strange thing is, I fit in with the bullies socially. I'm an athlete, I'm in honors classes, I'm a typical teenager. But one thing not typical about me is how I view others. Everyone is equal to me. I am friends with at least one person in each social group in my school. I participate in theatre, I'm in band, I'm in several clubs, and I go to church regularly. I'm not afraid to talk to a stranger and make them feel important. This is why I am bullied.

I may look like some of the "popular" girls and I may participate in some of the same things as them, but I am different. I am myself and that scares them. I moved to a new school halfway through my freshman year and it's now halfway through my junior year. At first, the popular group tried to pull me into their group, which they were somewhat successful at, but once they realized who I was, I soon became a target for them. There have been plenty of rumors spread about me but people don't believe them because they know who I am. There have been many times when I feel worthless, a lot of times being at clubs where I tend to sit by myself due to the fact that the other people don't find me acceptable. But I know those people won't matter to me in the future and what they say about me doesn't matter as long as I know myself.

They have tried countless times to drag me down, and yes, at times they have done so, but as time has gone on, I've gotten stronger. I've realized though that not everyone is like me. Many people who are victims of the bullies in my school don't have the same mentality as me and don't know how to stand up to them. This is what I'm trying to do. I want to stop this bullying. Out of all the places I've lived, the place where I am currently living has been the worse when it comes to bullying, especially since everyone here basically grew up together being in such a small city. I'm the outcast, the "new girl", the freak, but also the savior.

I've stood up for many people in school, stopping the pain that those people feel every day.

I give them courage and hope for the future. This is what I do. I'm doing it for others. I hope more people decide to do the same thing because it can truly make a difference.

Don't give up and don't let the bullies succeed.

By: Megan

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Never Give Up

Posted: 11/19/2013

When I was in 8th grade I was walking home from school and noticed two boys beating up on one boy on a dirt path that surrounded the reservoir near our school. I don’t know what it was but I immediately ran up and pushed both of the boys off of this boy whom was younger than I and that I did not know. I told both of them to get out of here now or I will come after them. Both boys hesitated then left. I reached down to the boy on the ground and pulled him up with my two hands. His face was dirty and had cuts on it. His clothes were also dirty. I asked him what had happened. He told me that they just didn’t like him because he was different than them. He said he has a learning disability. I told him look, if they ever touch you again, tell the Principal or tell me. I grew up in a neighborhood where there were very large families and I had a lot of friends unlike this boy. I was in 8th grade, he was in 7th at the time.

Years later, I went on to always help the underdog, the one who was out numbered even standing up to my own so called friends who were about to outnumber a boy one night at a high school party. That boy never forgot that night that I stepped up to the bully in my grade for him.

I went on to become a Police Officer and was one for 20 years in the Boston area. That boy from the first incident approached me in a pub 15 years later and asked my name. I replied who I was. He said, “I want to thank you for saving me back in 7th grade, I never forgot it and I’m glad you’re a Police Officer protecting others.” I was floored!! The other boy I helped at the high school party, well he thanked me years later and he became a Police Officer himself and still is one today!

Sad to say, the boy in the first story passed away at the age of 45 last month due to medical issues he had. Stay strong, never give up and remember that there are people who want to help you. Just ask, reach out and you’ll be surprised how many there are.

By: Brian

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My Child, Somebody

Posted: 11/15/2013

Bravery to me is watching my children expose their vulnerabilities to the world, with no regard for themselves, in order to protect somebody that may not be able to. Pride is what my children give me everyday they go out into the world and have the courage to be Somebody. All three of my children have been bullied in some way or another. How they have reacted to it is what makes me the proudest as a mom. It is because of them that I wrote the following letter in hopes that people will have a better understanding about them, as well as anyone else that may be different.

Someone, Meet My Child, Somebody

I don’t know if Someone knows this, but my child, Somebody, suffers from severe anxiety. I don’t know why or how, Somebody just does. Somebody is not able to turn it on and off or decide when to worry or not. It is not easy for Somebody to pretend that everything is okay, all day, every day. Most of the time Somebody tries to be really happy, especially when Somebody is around Someone. Then there are days that Somebody’s anxiety is so high that Somebody feels nervous and sick. When Somebody is in class it can be hard for Somebody to sit still. When Somebody’s anxiety level is high, the anxiety starts to build up so much, that Somebody has to get rid of it somehow. Unfortunately, Somebody ends up fidgeting in their seat or Somebody may need to get up and walk it off. On really stressful days, it can get so bad that Somebody’s hands or feet may start to feel numb almost like they are going to sleep. In order for Somebody to get rid of that feeling, Somebody has to rub their hands together or walk to wake them up.

The best way to get Someone to understand what it is like living with anxiety is for Someone to imagine feeling their worst fear all the time or that feeling you get when you are about to make the first drop on a rollercoaster. Somebody tells me it really stinks. Our family wouldn’t wish this on anyone in the world. We wouldn’t wish it on Someone, even if it meant that Somebody would never be bullied or teased by Someone again. It is hard to live with, but Somebody chooses to be happy and tries not to dwell on it.

I hope that by sharing Somebody’s secret with Someone, they might choose to have a little more understanding and compassion not just for Somebody, but others that are struggling with Someone or Something too. I believe we will all struggle with Someone or Something at some point in our lives, so I write this for all of us out there that know Somebody struggling right now.

I am sure there is Someone out there that may want to continue to spread rumors or make fun of Somebody; there is nothing we can do to change that. Someone may be sitting laughing at Somebody right now. Well that is on you and your parents. It just has me wondering what must be going on in your life that makes you want to hurt Somebody for no other reason than to be mean. Someone, you could really be liked for being you and happy; rather than feared and mean. For those of you that stand up for Somebody, you are Somebody’s best friends and we can’t thank you enough. It takes a lot of courage and strength to do that for Somebody. We will be grateful and Somebody will be your friend for a lifetime.

To every Someone out there, friend or not, our family just wants you to know that no matter what, Somebody will not change who they are for Someone else. So maybe the next time Someone sees Somebody fidgeting or being “hyper”, Someone will remember what I have said here and just leave Somebody alone. For those of you that truly know Somebody, and the great person Somebody is, you are kind and a true friend. For you to look past Somebody’s “quirks” and like Somebody for the person they are is a testament to what kind of people you and your parents are. You really are Somebody’s hero and we just want to say thank you.

Finally, I hope that Someone remembers this…The only cure for ignorance is knowledge and I hope that you have learned Something about Somebody or Someone. Who knows maybe one day you will be Someone who wants to be Somebody’s friend. I only have one last question to ask… who are you?

Honored and proud to be,

Somebody’s Mom

Copyright 2013 T.Krim & SomebodysMom.org All rights reserved

By: Tracy

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Scarred from school bullying

Posted: 11/13/2013

My name is Julie and I live in Denmark (a small country in Europe). I would like to share my story with you.

I was bullied from when I was 7 until I was 14.

It started in my first school. I was a very shy girl, didn’t talk much, and had very few friends. The only real friend I had only liked me because she could push me around whenever she liked. The popular girls in my school didn’t talk with me or even acknowledge my existence, apart from when they talked about me behind my back. It wasn’t fun, but it wasn’t terrible either. In 1st grade my favorite teacher, who always used to make sure I didn’t get treated too bad, quit. That’s when the nightmare started. The girls from school would call me mean things, laugh at me, and spread nasty rumors. They would call me fat, ugly, a dwarf (I wasn’t very tall), a gnome, troll, idiot, or worse, and I’d believe them. Sometimes they even hit me, but I didn’t tell anyone because I figured it was my own fault. The boys just laughed at me or pushed me around. It got to a point where I was afraid to go to school, where I’d go to bed and hope I wouldn’t wake up.

Eventually I changed schools. My new school was o.k. nobody really talked much to me, but as long as they didn’t hit me or call me names, I was happy (almost. As close I could be at that time). Then a new girl entered my grade. I tried to be friendly and get to know her, but she manipulated me into being her minion. Eventually I broke it off with her but she now manipulated every girl in the grade (except for me) to be her minions. She decided I was annoying and began bullying me. She’d get others to do her dirty work. For example, once it was my turn to sweep the classroom after school, but she stayed around, together with two other girls. She started by calling me mean things, then she got the two other girls to hit me, until I tried to run to my bike, to go home. I had just gotten onto it, when they grabbed the bike, and with me on it shoved it, so I fell to the ground with the bike on top of me. They then called me things I’d rather not mention, and hit me some more. Eventually I got home, but I sat in the corner of my living room for an hour, trying to stop crying. I started feeling really bad again, and even became slightly bulimic. I’d eat a lot of greasy or unhealthy food, and then I’d make myself throw up in the toilet, so I wouldn’t gain any weight. I was only a bit over the “normal” BMI, but I felt huge. I started throwing up, just to get to stay home from school. I began getting nasty thoughts, suicide thoughts. The thing about words is they can hurt so much more than punches. If someone tells you enough times that you’re fat, ugly, and that this planet would be better without you, you start believing it. I begged my parents to let me change schools again, but I wasn’t allowed. I told my teacher, but he didn’t care. I’d get panic attacks, and I’d break down at least 4 times a week. My home life wasn’t good either. I had (and still have) many problems with my parents.

Eventually I changed schools, and my new school is great. Good teachers, good classmates. I still have those thoughts though. I have to struggle with suicide thoughts, depression, thoughts about cutting, loneliness and slight bulimia every day. Those schools left me scarred, and now I find it very difficult to gain friends. I have some though. I wish I could tell you, it all just went away. That I never had those thoughts again, and that everything is perfect, but that would be a lie. Its better, definitely, and sometimes I forget about it, even for several hours, but it’s never truly gone. I’m better though, and I hope to help others In my situation.

Sincerely,
Julie

P.S. think about your words. They can hurt more than you think.

By: Julie

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Will U Stand?

Posted: 10/31/2013

Charleigh Gere with willUstand offers advice on what YOU can do to help end bullying in your own communities. The video encourages youth to stand up, reach out, and seek out resources to help inspire bullying-free communities.

Find out more about WillUstand

By: Anonymous

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