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Share My Story to Help Others

Posted: 1/18/2012

I wanted to share my story with younger teenagers to show them that they are not alone.

I was seven years old when I was first noticed as a suitable target. I was average height, blonde haired, brown eyed and adhered to the school uniform, the only thing different about me was that I was on my own since my best friend, Sophie, had moved away. It wasn't much at first, occasionally I would be ignored by other students and would play by myself between lessons but that was about it. I would sit at the back of the class and sink into my own world, giving my peers an excuse to laugh at me and call me names. I lost my connections with what little friends I had left and was outcast completely.

At that point, it was only names and ignorance. At that age, kids don't have any real sense of much else. When I got a little older, the abuse began to get worse.

By the time I was in year four I was almost afraid to go into school. I would be laughed at during lunchtime and ate in silence most days, occasionally "forgetting" my dinner so I didn't have to sit with people who would call me names and throw my food on the ground. I made a few friends that year, but they would only play with me when there was nobody to see and so I would still play in silence. The boys of the year would chase me with spiders and put them in the hood of my coat so they would crawl out onto my neck, and then laugh when I screamed.

Luckily, my relief came walking home from school as my mum used to come and meet me, and so nobody would try anything once the adults arrived. That of course was overcome quite quickly, as they then turned to insulting my parents behind my back and spreading rumours. Once my family found out they complained to the school, but hardly anything could be done to stop it as the teachers could never catch the students in the act. I started being followed home in year six when I could make the journey alone. My little brother had started school by this point as well and was warned by his friends to tell nobody we were related or else the same would happen to him. That year was when the violence began. People would push and trip me on the way home so I would fall and scrape my face and hands and knees on the pavement.

We complained to the school again that year, and I was told to make a list of everyone who bullied me. Unfortunately, the girls who were responsible offered to help and, oblivious, the teacher let them so I was unable to tell the truth. The fact I complained was enough to make the abuse worse and worse, and I learned to keep my mouth shut.

The violence worsened when I reached secondary school. I would have people goad me into retaliation, then when I turned I would have pieces of sharpened flint thrown at my face until I was on the floor, covered in blood and screaming. I was almost blinded once, and yet the other students just kicked me as they passed and went home. The girl I would walk home with would run and hide so that nobody could see she was with me, and then return when they had gone and take me to her house to get cleaned up before I got home. I was told that snitching would make the assaults worse, and so I stayed quiet and lied to cover their tracks.

A couple of years later I was subjected to a different kind of abuse. I had managed to secure a few friends and through one of them I met Jordan. He was a lovley guy, charming and sweet and made me feel wanted and safe. He would tell me that he could protect me from the people who hurt me, and for the first time in my life I felt loved. I was thirteen by this point, he was fifteen. We had been together a month before I went to his place, as he lived quite far away from myself, and thats when the change happened. He would try to undress me, and when I refused he would ask me if I loved him or not. He began to use me as a sex object, forcing me to touch him and perform indecent acts upon him. Its taken me five years to realise that he sexually abused me in horrifying ways and to tell anybody about it, as I was terrified of being called names and worsening the attacks.

I suffered with Jordan for five months before he left me. I found out that during our "relationship" he had cheated on me twice, both times making it seem like it was all my fault. I begged him not to leave but he became more and more annoyed and eventually abused me mentally and verbally, telling me that I would never be loved and that I deserved all the pain and more because I was a worthless little sl** who should go die.

I'm eighteen now. In five years I have gone from self harm, to attempted suicide. I have been cheated on and sexually abused again and now I live with underlying mental health problems which will be with me for my entire life. I cannot trust anyone, I have depression, social anxiety disorders, self hatred issues and often still believe I am worthless - but I am getting better. Its been two years since the last attack, the scars are healing and I have secured a group of friends and a boyfriend who loves me.

Bullying and abuse must be stopped before more young people are forced to a point where they want to take their own lives. I'm living proof that it only gets better once its stopped.

By: Lydia, from the UK

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My Story Of Being Bullied

Posted: 1/18/2012

First, I want to say I congratulate and admire all of you who have come forward in sharing your stories with all of us. Each unique story brings inspiration, hope and a reminds everyone else that they are not alone in their suffering.

I am 32 years old, but I was a victim of childhood bullying. It started in 6th grade, my first year of junior high school. I was made fun of for being too skinny, wearing clothes that weren't brand name, I was called ugly, told I smelled, had gross hair, everything. I was spit at, pushed into walls, jumped once, and had my belongings destroyed - someone cut my brand new raincoat to pieces for spite. I tried to smile through the pain and go on with my life but over time it took a serious toll on me. I began feeling sick and anxious at the thought of going to school. I lost interest in everything. I felt so ugly, worthless, hopeless, and sad. What should have been fun, happy years of my life, were tainted by vicious kids.

This bullying affected EVERYTHING. From doing poorly on my SAT's and not gaining admittance to college post high school, to paranoia-anxiety disorder, to poor relationship and friendship choices . . . the list goes on. I allowed myself to be their victim, I let them win.

At the age of 28 I took a stand for myself to fight back. After reflecting on my early 20's and taking stock of my choices in life, I realized that I was STILL allowing people to use me, abuse me, and take me for granted. Standing up for yourself does not mean being a bad, uncaring, unloving person. It means having enough dignity for yourself to know when to walk away. It takes a lot of courage to say enough is enough but I have. I became an animal rights activist, a church volunteer, I won the Miss Long Island Model 4x in a row, went on to being crowned Ms. East Coast USA Fitness Supreme Champion, was an honor roll student in college, and became a Fitness Competitor. Working out and dieting with discipline not only made me feel and look good but it gave me a goal to focus on and accomplish...ME

Today at 32, I still carry some of the scars within from the bullying, I'm not sure it'll ever go away but one thing I know for sure, I will NEVER "allow" myself to be a victim again! I wasted enough of my life.

On a side note, most of those kids that made fun of me?  They wound up in jail, miserable, or worse, dead from overdose.I guess I'm finally realizing maybe I wasn't the one with the problem. Anyone who feels the need to hurt someone in anyway obviously is projecting their misery onto you, either stemming from jealousy or just pure internal conflict. Whatever be the case, remember, YOU are NOT the one with the problem.

Be you, enjoy you, realize you have a reason you are alive, find your purpose and calling, be an inspiration and most of all, never be a victim again.

Fight back by being fabulous!!

Love, respect and best wishes to you all.

By: Jacklyn

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Do Not Give Up. I Didn't!

Posted: 1/10/2012

My poem reflects what can and does occur when bullying gets ignored and "our children" have lost hope.As parents, educators, counselors, and peers, when we see bullying - when we step up and step in - we ARE the voice of HOPE.

They Couldn't Stay

Someone took their life today
pain so deep
they couldn't stay.

Whispers echoed through the soul
all alone
no longer whole.

Did you look the other way
when you saw
hate on display?

Someone took their life today
pain so deep
they couldn't stay.
(DLC © 2012)

To all of you kids out there being bullied know that you are strong! Know that the best revenge is to shine! Don't give up! When you give up they all win, but really they are not winners. People who are winners do not put others down for any reason! Try and rise above the name calling and whispering. Seriously, tell someone who can help you and keep telling until someone listens. You deserve to be listened to and you deserved to be helped. Do not give up. I didn't!

By: Deb

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Just Like Any Other Small Town School

Posted: 1/10/2012

Well, my school is pretty much like any other small town school. Little drama here, major drama there. But bullies don't usually come around anymore. Me and my friends know how to handle them. even though we aren't the ones being bullied ever. We know that other people are being bullied and we know that other people need our help. We know what repruccussions happen from bullying. Like we haven't seen movies and all these suicide stories about being bullied. Well, my school has one bully who messes with everybody. He is always picking on someone and I just think people should teach him a major lesson. He made a girl cry this morning because he called her a "fat slob". She is one of the skinniest kids in the whole school. Some people get to the point of injuring themselves. The cut themselves and that's not something people schold result to because people don't know how to act. They should stop bullying. We should make it illegal. That is going to be my project this year. "Mae stands up against Bullying!"

By: Madison

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Each And Every One of Us Is Beautiful

Posted: 1/10/2012

Every day i look around the world and i see people being bullied and people getting into fights I have some of my friends tell me "this person is saying mean things about me online" and I just get tired of it. People make u fell horrible about yourself and tell u things that are not true just so they can bring u down and it's not okay. Sometimes I feel as if when people tease other people and make them feel less of themselves that it's outta jealousy and hate. What bullies post online about one another is senseless. what bullies don't realize when they post nasty comments about somebody's weight or apperience is that It lowers down a persons self image. i hate dealing with all this drama that somedays I just wanna give up and not show up to school. I hate having that Feeling everyday that it's almost like I'm afraid To do certain things because  i'm scared of what people may Think. i am a regular human being and no matter what I always tell myself and my friends that "each and every one of us are beautiful no matter what anyone says and to never let the fear of what people will think keep u from playing the game because you are you and no one can ever change that"

By: Alex

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Someone Is Willing To Listen

Posted: 1/10/2012

When you hear the word bullying you oftenthink of those stories when there's a group of kids picking on one lonely victim. Kids being mean. But in my story, it looks a whole lot different.

In my story I'm a nine year old girl in school. I have many friends that I love and having a great time with. Cause, you see, the person who is mean to me is not a child. She is a grown up. She's my grown up teacher.

The abuse started the second trimesterof third grade (when I first got her as my teacher) and continued on to sixth grade, it didn't really help telling a teacher. They didn't believe me, a little kid, why would they? I remember thinking that maybe I was exaggerating and that it was all in my head.
She could not have been bullying me because she wanted to be in control. Cause, let's face it, as an adult and as my teacher she sort of already was.

By the time I was ten and started fourth grade I was a mess inside. I was now eally depressed and struggled with that alone in secerecy. And also, I recall having suicidal thoughts. As the two following years of Primary School went on I was still struggling depression. I had started self harming as coping mechanism, but I'm not sure at exactly what age though. Now, looking back at seventh grade, I see that my relationship with food was gradually worsening. And without myself noticing at first, I had developed an eating disorder during seventh grade as another way of coping with my issues.

Now I am seventeen years old and studying music. I am in recovery of my EDNOS and self harm. I am at the time being diagnosed as bipolar and also getting help for that.

When Demi Lovato came out with her story last year she saved me, literally saved me. She showed me that you can recover and rise above whatever troubles lies upon you. And more importantly, that it is worth fighting for. Now that I have been saved, I want to save those who are suffering right now. Demi saved me with her story and now I can maybe save someone with mine.

Bullying can cause so many problems. It is NEVER okay. So for anyone that is being bullied right now or has been bullied. It is not your fault! If you are hurting it's not all in your head and you're not exaggerating. You have the right to be happy just as anybody else. And if you are dealing with any of the problems I was, please speak up and get help. Don't be afraid, there is always someone that is willing to listen!

By: Isabella

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I Still Fight, Every Day

Posted: 1/10/2012

My name is Marion, I'm from Norway and i'm 15 soon 16 years old.

I've been bullying since i was 8 years old, on my first school everyone was cool, no one was bullying each other, we all were friends and had a lot of fun. When i was 10 years old we moved to an other place in Norway and then it all started.

I didn't go in the same clothes as they did, and they called me things that really hurt, like "ugly" and about being sexually active, i didn’t know what some of the names meant. okey, maybe i was ugly... I also thought i had a best friend... we were dancing Hip-Hop together and had sleepover with each other and we always met when we had time. But the verbal harassment din't stop.

I finally told my parents about what they told me, and we moved from that place to Oslo when i was 11 years old, and it didn’t stop there either.
but i didn't want to move, my granddad told me that you can't move from all your problems, you got to face some of them.
they called me some really bad words and they hurted me so much.

The day before my first day on middle school i got a text massage from the cutest and coolest boy and he asked me if i wanted to be his girlfriend...
I got so happy and said yes to him... a big mistake... i thought that now everything is gonna be okey.
The first day on middle school did some girls come to me and asked me if I was "his" girlfriend... and i said yes, they looked at me and said, "well... no, you're not."
"i said what do you mean? i don't understand..." and they said that i lied.

I got sad and walked out for getting some air.. and he comes out after me with a lot of people and said, "why are you lying?" and i found my cell phone and showed him and all the other the message he had sent me and the same girl said to me "you can change the date and time on messages" and i gave her the phone and said "show me!" and she just said "I don’t understand your phone" and i ran away from them.

on Halloween a friend of me borrowed a dress from me that my grandma had made to me, and i told her to be careful with it...
I got cold and wanted to go home, so she could just give me the dress when she camed back.

when i got it back it was destroyed... i cryed and my mom camed home and she saw my tears and the dress in my hands.

i was 14 when that was happen, and then i was thinking on suicide.. and started cutting me, i knew that i needed help but i didn't dare...
my friends started asking me what was wrong . . .they saw it in my eyes that something was wrong, they had never seen my eyes "without" a soul.
and on the summer they saw my cuts and they told a school nurse about it, she asked if she could talk to me and i told her everything, my tears was falling down on the table,

and she said that i should go to psychologist for getting the help i needed and started to go to her one time in the week everyday until it din't help anymore and she sent me to a treatment..

my mom was so worried and she was so afraid everytime she was coming down in the morning for waking me up . . . because she didn’t know what she could expect when she walked into the door.

I got help.

for a few weeks ago we had school prom and they treated me so badly that i started to cry . . .and i tried to walk home in high heels on the ice.
My bestfriend called my mom and told her what had happend and what i did. my dad picked me up with his car and drove home.. my mom was sitting with me almost the whole night,
My mom was thinking of letting me be home from school the day after my prom... but i was going on school... but i camed home again very quick because they was really mean on facebook to me . . .
they called me and i couldn't see their numbers but i took it and they was calling me really bad words . . .
I want an end on this.

sometimes i don't wanna go on school, i just wanna sleep, i feel comfort with my animals and i still fight everyday . . .my worst enemy now is . . .myself.

I don’t know how much i can deal with anymore . . .

By: Marion

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I Am Soooo Much Stronger

Posted: 12/30/2011

I was bullied and still am.

All started in 4th grade, I was getting bullied because i was skinny and boney. i didnt have alot of friends but only one.. she was a good friend. Her name is Tatiana. We was friends untill junior high. I moved around alot so i had a hard time making and keeping friends. In 7th grade i went to a Middle School.

That was the worst year of my life. I had rumors going around. My parents and other adults told me if it isnt true i have nothing to worry about.. worried me because i have to go to school 5 days a week and people were literally yelling innapropriate things at me. So how could I have ignored that??

I started cutting and thinking about suicide. My mom fund out and sent me to the hospital. I had to be at several hospitals. All Because of suicide attempts. I hurt my family alot and then I didn't think about how I would affect them.

But know i know and I am sooo much stronger and I "HEART" MYSELF!!!

By: Yasmein

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A Happy Memory

Posted: 12/30/2011

Gunnar is my 10 year old son. He is in 5th grade; is very small for his age; wears glasses and is in all the high classes in his grade. So with all that said he gets bullied for being a "stand out" in the class.

Gunnar was getting bullied a recess and we had to step in to help. He at one point was wanting to go to school less days then the other kids just to avoid those days at recess. Many talks with the counselor at school finally stopped it.

We took a stand together as a family and met with the counselor at school, who in turn met with the students and families of the bullies.

Best gift ever this year from Gunnar is page in his Memory Book from school he brought home from school this year.

"A happy memory for me was when my mom helped handle bullies last year because I was having a hard time and to this day I don't get bullied anymore. My mom helps me through lots of my problems and that's why I love her."

I must say I have been re-reading that page over and over.

It is a gift that keeps on giving.

By: Brenda, Gunnar's Mom

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The Call for Help

Posted: 12/30/2011

This poem come from my heart because i have been bullied since i was in pre-k and i'm a freshman now.

With in my life i see a light of joy and everyday it keeps fading into darkness. So i wish the light would come back. Also i fear what will happen once i'm in the darkness, i really hope my life can be bright once again. My friends i hope you'll help me out of darkness and into light, so will they be there for me or will i stay in darkness? At the start of my life i was only a little into darkness and mostly in light. Then when i started going to public schools i started to trail off into the darkness everyday. Some times i her the light calling me back, but the darkness always comes back. I just feel like an outsider, but always living in darkness. I just wish someone out there would come and help me back to the light. Then i can start over in the light and stay away from darkness. So if someone is out there please help me out of darkness. I beg you if anyone is out there once and help me and the others whom have walked this path of darkness. Til then we are still going deeper and deeper into darkness.

By: Heather

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