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When Parents Should Be Concerned About Their Child's Behavior

The following is not meant to be comprehensive but presents some of the most common behaviors of concern in young children. It is designed to assist parents in understanding some of the markers for normal behavior and when to be concerned. Of course, any time you are concerned about your child for a period of time, you should contact a medical or other professional.

Infancy (Birth to 1 year)

Normal Behavior	Behavior of Concern
Cries in response to frustration, hunger, or fatigue	Excessive crying that continues even when needs are met
Has regular sleep habits; sleeps soundly	Not sleeping; restless sleeper
Recognizes familiar faces; may be scared by strangers	Shows random affection with familiar faces; may show irrational fear without cause
Tracks movement with eyes by 2 to 3 months	Does not track movement with eyes by 2 to 3 months
Snuggles and relaxes when held	Muscles become rigid when held; doesn’t want to be held
Smiles responsively by 2 to 3 months	Seldom smiles

List of Suggestions for Parent Action

• Babies should not be disciplined; they are too little to know right from wrong
• Document and describe the behavior of concern
• If you are still concerned, call your pediatrician or a medical hotline
• Document all interactions with medical or help personnel

Toddler (1 to 3 years)

Normal Behavior	Behavior of Concern
Constant exploration, walking, running, and climbing	Fearful of exploration
Can be left with minimal anxiety	Severe separation anxiety
Interested in toilet training by 18 months to 2 years, but may not be successful	Attempts to toilet train are difficult and creates excessive anxiety and behaviors
Uses the word “no”	Consistently screams instead of using language
Responds with curiosity to stimulus; comfortable with touch and noise	Easily overwhelmed by stimulus; overreacts to touch or noise
May hit and bite, but an be redirected and stopped	Severe temper tantrums that cannot be redirected or stopped

List of Suggestions for Parent Action

• Be consistent and set time limits for behavioral interventions
• Keep track of frequency and intensity of behaviors to see if there is a pattern
• If you are still concerned, all your pediatrician or a medical hotline
• Document all interactions with medical or help personnel

Early Childhood (3 to 5 years)

Normal Behavior	Behavior of Concern
More engaged in positive interaction with peers	Has difficulty playing or taking turns with peers
Imaginary companions	Seems unusually cruel to animals
Likes one-on-one attention from caregivers, but can share attention as well	Responds aggressively to shared attention
Curious; asks “why” questions	Belligerent behavior in response to change in schedule or unexpected or unknown situation
Has fears; shows off and uses bad language to get attention	Excessive fears; uses bad language to get control
Aggressive behavior to family members or peers that an be redirected	Intentionally harmful behavior to self or others
Is actively exploring environment, but an take direction in safety	Excessively hyperactive; does not respond to or remember safety instructions Exhibits dangerous behavior; starts fires

List of Suggestions for Parent Action

• Reinforce appropriate behavior by affirming the behavior you want
• Develop a way to rewarding appropriate behavior and consistently implement it for several weeks to see if the behavior of concern is hanging
• Reassure your child that you love him or her despite the challenging behaviors
• Inform or remind child of a schedule and what is going to happen next
• Keep track of frequency and intensity of behaviors to see if there is a pattern
• Call your school district to ask for the telephone number of the early childhood coordinator; ask this person to give you suggestions for responding to the behaviors of concern
• Call your pediatrician to schedule an appointment